by Wendy Silvers | Apr 3, 2014 | Compassionate Parenting, Conscious Loving, Conscious Parenting, Leadership & Empowerment, Universal Peace Principles, Wendy's Wisdom Notes
Nonviolence is absolute commitment to the way of love. Love is not emotional bash; it is not empty sentimentalism. It is the active outpouring of one’s whole being into the being of another.
— Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., 1957
April 4th brings the 17th Annual Season for Nonviolence event to a close. This annual 64 day campaign, co-founded in 1998 by Dr. Arun Gandhi and The Association for Global New Thought (AGNT), spanning from January 30th – April 4th, the memorial anniversaries of Mahatma Gandhi and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. It is a time when focus is brought to the philosophy of attaining peace through nonviolent action. It is so wonderful to honor these profound wayshowers as well as recognize that living from a consciousness of peace, love, compassion, empathy, nonviolence, forgiveness and reconciliation is an everyday practice not an event..
There is no greater crucible for the practice of nonviolence, peace and compassion than partnering and co-parenting. I heard a mom say recently that, “world peace begins at home.” I am in complete agreement, however, how many people can say that they grew up in families where peace, love, compassion, kindness, generosity, empathy and connected communication was practiced?
Being in relationship is a work of the heart. It is a deeply spiritual practice. I often joke that it’s like putting miracle grow on the places within us that are seeking nurturing, loving and healing. Add a child or children to the mix and parenting becomes a whole different adventure. There’s nothing more heartrending than seeing the crumpled face and fear in your child’s eyes when you and partner fight in front of them or lash out at them in anger. Every child wants their parents to get along. It hurts them deeply when they see and hear their parents being hurtful to one another. The impact of parents not getting along on children is something that takes a long time to transcend. A child begins to believe about themselves what they see and hear in their house from their parents and it becomes their inner voice. Here are some questions to consider:
If you answered YES to any of these questions, join me, Sunday, April 6, 2:30-4:30pm at the Agape International Spiritual Center where we will explore the 4 Keys to Co-Parenting Peacefully.
The bliss, ecstasy and everything falling into place that we see unfold in tv shows and movies doesn’t typically occur off the screen. Real life relating can be messy and unpredictable. Even, and, especially, when you’re on a spiritual path. It can be mystifying how calm and centered you might be in your meditation or at your spiritual community yet one wrong word or look from your partner and it’s like kerosene to your being and you flip your lid. When family of origin issues emerge, you may find yourself communicating in ways that are ineffective and combative. This doesn’t mean that you’re bad and wrong or that the person you’re with is bad or wrong. It’s just an indication that deeper work is calling us forth. Most of us weren’t shown how to have healthy, conscious, intimate relationships. Most clients I sit with didn’t grow up seeing conflicts resolved through compassionate, connected communication. And, like it or not, what we don’t address, and, embrace, we usually repeat.
If you’d like to experience greater peace in your co-parenting relationship and in your relating, join me for the 4 Keys to Co-Parent Peacefully presentation Sunday, April 6, 2:30-4:30, at the monthly Parenting Ministry meeting at the Agape International Spiritual Center, 5700 Buckingham Parkway, Culver City, 90230.
You will leave with:
- 4 keys to Co-Parent peacefully
- Tools to communicate from a nonviolent, compassionate and connected place
- Powerful strategies to unhook yourself when triggered
- Ways to repair any ruptures with your partners, co-parents and children
This is an adults only workshop. Love donations are welcome. Childcare will be offered at $5 per child. You must RSVP so that we are sure to have childcare. RSVP: parentingministry@agapelive.com
Until next time, know that you are powerful beyond measure and loved beyond description.
Peace and many blessings,
Director, Agape Parenting Ministry
 Are you a busy mama? Or, know one? Gift yourself or someone you know with Balance for Busy Moms, an international bestseller. My chapter is, Rock Yo Mama Self: 4 Pathways to Activate your WOMB wisdom. You’ll both be so happy you did. Mother’s Day is every day! https://wendysilvers.com/balance-for-busy-moms/ |
|
|
by Wendy Silvers | Mar 18, 2014 | Uncategorized
Balance for Busy Moms is an International Best-seller!! Get it Now!
It’s official — this brilliant compendium of information, resources, tips and tools is an International Best-Seller!!
And, yours truly is one of its authors!! My chapter is:
Rock Yo Mama Self: 4 Pathways to Activate your WOMB Wisdom.
Are you a busy mama? Or, know one? Gift yourself or someone you know with this book. You’ll both be so happy you did. Mother’s Day is every day!
~ Wendy Silvers, Spiritual Midwife, Helping Moms Birth and Earth their Visions onto BEing,
and Founder of the Million Mamas Movement
by Wendy Silvers | Mar 5, 2014 | Conscious Loving, Leadership & Empowerment, Uncategorized, Universal Peace Principles, Wendy's Wisdom Notes
9 Steps to Family Forgiveness
It’s hard to believe that summer is coming to an end. It seems as though it flew by. My oldest nephew leaves for college in a week, which is stunning to me because it seems like just yesterday he was a baby. Much as I would like to, I don’t get to see him very often, as he lives far from us. We talk about visiting, though it gets a bit complicated because of his parents’ divorce years ago.
As you reflect on your summer, are your thoughts filled with cherished memories of special quality time spent with extended family? Or are your memories of family togetherness tinged with thoughts of emotionally-charged moments? Reuniting with family can feel warm and fuzzy and wonderful, or it can be like visiting a dangerous neighborhood that triggers hyper-vigilance as you watch your step and watch your back.
Unresolved and festering feelings can throw a serious wrench in family fun, especially when one feels injured by another person’s words and behavior. And whatever the infraction may have been, if it is unresolved, it seems to grow with time. Do you ever find yourself having an imaginary conversation with the person you feel wronged you? Well, maybe you haven’t, but I’ve sure done this. So, off we go to reunions and have a great time — or we come back with more grudges. What sets the tone for a pleasant experience or a dreadful experience? Forgiveness.
Forgiveness is for YOU. It’s your liberation from the relentless re-experiencing of a hurt. It releases you from the gnawing feeling of ick you feel inside each time you hear the person’s name or see their face. In certain cases, not remaining in touch with a family member makes absolute sense. If you fear for your physical or emotional safety, distancing yourself may be wise. In other situations, when the idea of forgiveness is presented, many people balk. “But he, but she, but they,” is a common refrain. Yet what is the most self-loving act to take? To forgive another and let go of harboring a new resentment or a longstanding one is a high act of self-liberation. Forgiveness is a simple choice to make but not always easy to do, especially when we feel we are right.
Forgiveness is not about condoning what occurred; it is about freeing up psychic energy that whirls inside of you so that your heart is more open. The truth is that when we nurse resentments and hold unforgiveness, the object of our disdain is usually doing fine, thank you very much. So, who’s the one who’s imprisoned? Buddha said, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”
I practice forgiveness on a daily basis because I want to feel good. I make a choice to live with an open heart. Here’s what I do to help me free myself of resentment, which leads to unforgiveness, a grimace on my face, a closed heart and lots of noise in my head. It can take me a minute at times to feel the release or even recognize that the agada I’m feeling inside stems from unforgiveness. As I said, it’s a practice. If I still feel upset about the person or situation, I repeat the process.
1. Write a Letter
I write a letter to the person, place or situation that I feel resentment toward. I let it rip, with no edits. But I don’t send it, of course. When it’s complete, I read it to a dear and trusted friend who knows that I’ve just lost my mind for a minute. And then I burn it.
2. Set an Intention
I do not do anything without first setting an intention for what I want to experience in any interaction or situation. These are the questions to ask yourself: What do I want to experience? What am I bringing to this interaction and/or situation? Change the focus so that it’s not on what you’re going to get. Be prepared before you step into the room with your family members. Consider what example you are setting for your children. Children remember what you do more than what you say.
3. Define Forgiveness
Many times there’s a misconception that forgiving is condoning, and that’s not the case. Forgiveness sets us free rather than keeping us in emotional bondage to the experience and to the person(s) involved. Keep in mind the old adage, “Would you rather be happy or right?”
4. Explore Your Expectations
I continually explore expectations of myself, other people and situations so that I am not blindsided by the subtle act of setting myself up for disappointment. What yardstick am I measuring myself against? Was there an unexpressed expectation? Are you expecting people to be who they’re not? Expectations can be premeditated resentments.
5. Consider Your Personal Payoff for Holding a Grudge
Ooh, this one is a doozy to look at. Many times there can be a false sense of empowerment or self-righteous anger over something that occurred, and people can be reluctant to let go of this. The right use of anger is different than self-righteous anger.
6. Communicate
How do you communicate? When we’re attached to being “right,” it leaves little room for understanding each other’s needs. If you communicate through the stink eye, smoldering silence, snide, biting comments, or slamming cabinets and doors, make the decision to practice compassionate communication so that resolution may be reached.
7. Self-love
Don’t beat yourself up. Don’t speak to yourself meanly. Be kind to yourself. And if that looks like removing yourself from negative conversation and behavior, do so. Do not fall prey to the false belief that it is noble to remain in situations that are unacceptable to get them right. Sometimes love says “enough is enough.”
8. Be Willing to See Yourself, People and Situations Differently
Most people are doing the best they can in any given situation. Their best may not work for you, but your best may not work for them, either.
9. Remain Open to Miracles
Miracles are available to us at all times. Miracles are shifts in consciousness that occur all the time. Be open to something unexpected and magnificent happening right before your eyes.
This article was originally published on Huffington Post, 8/18/2012
by Wendy Silvers | Feb 21, 2014 | Compassionate Parenting, Conscious Parenting, Leadership & Empowerment, Million Mamas Musings, Million Mamas Rising, Partnering, Universal Peace Principles, Wendy Silvers' Videos, Wendy's Wisdom Notes
The power of the feminine energy is rising in our culture. Our girls are exposed to way more than we were when we were growing up ~ more choices, more challenges. How do we prepare them to live fulfilling, prosperous and joyous lives in this world?
- Are you the mother of a daughter? Or, is there a girl in your life that you want to see feel confident and self-assured in her life?
- Would you like to be your daughter’s advocate and help her honor her voice?
- Would you like to counter the messages the media gives our girls about sex and sexuality?
- Would you like to help your daughter cultivate a vision of her future that incorporates the things she’s discovered she’s passionate about?
If you answered YES to any of these questions, and, if you’d like to ask me some questions about this, please join me, Saturday, February 22, 9 am PST/10 am MST/11 am CST/12 pm EST. Just click the image, or this link, to REGISTER FREE: http://raisingempowereddaughters.com/?ap_id=MamaWendy
