Hearts Broken Open – 7 Strategies to Heal our World
After the shooting occurred in Newtown, Ct., I felt moved to write this piece, which originally appeared on the Huffington Post. We may never know the why something like this happens. All we may have are strands of information and snippets of truth. We never know another souls’ journey really.
Blessings to all who were involved in this tragic event.
When tragic, almost unbelievable events like the shooting in Newtown, Connecticut, the shooting of 14-year old Malala Yousafzai in Pakistan and the shooting in Aurora, Colorado occur, a collective outpouring of grief and outrage unfolds.
Early Friday morning, after saying a final goodbye to two young African girls that my family had hosted for two nights, I called up a friend weeping at the probability that I may never see these precious girls again. In two short days, I had fallen in love with the girls, who were touring with the Assante choir. As I cried into the phone because I couldn’t imagine not ever seeing Divine and Arlene again, Adam Lanza was at the Newtown elementary school.
As a mother, my heart broke open for the parents and families whose loved ones died in the shooting in Newtown. I cannot imagine the inconsolable grief the parents of the young children must be feeling as well as the families of the teachers, principal, school psychologist, the gunman and his mother. As a spiritual therapist, parenting educator and the founder of the Million Mamas Movement, an organization dedicated to the thriving of women and children throughout the world, I have been speaking to concerned parents and lead several prayer circles since Friday’s shooting.
There are so many victims in this tragic event. Adam Lanza killed his mother with a gun she had in her home. What prompts a child to kill a parent? The whole community grieves and, as bystanders, we grieve with them. All parents entrust their school-age children to the school they attend believing that they will be safe while away from home. I received many calls from parents experiencing mounting anxiety as this past Monday morning rolled around. To provide support, I spoke a centering prayer.
While it is the human condition to point the finger at Adam Lanza for his violent spree and say it is because of lax gun controls, my mind has been entertaining other thoughts. The goals of the Million Mamas Movement include the teaching of peace principles and providing compassionate parenting programs to parents and educators. I feel moved to go to the root of what would cause a young man to shoot his mother and so many others. It occurs to me that we would find greater solace and solutions by integrating emotional/social intelligence into education and providing greater mental health options rather than displacing our grief and horror by focusing on gun control. This and other unfathomable acts of violence are a symptom of something deeper needing our care and attention.
In this high tech, fast moving global society, it can be easy to lose sight of how important it is to connect the old fashioned way.
Here are 7 tools I believe will help us heal as a society:
1. Cultivate a practice of having quiet time with your family, whether it is meditation, being in nature, talking about uplifting and inspiring things or just sitting together listening to music.
2. Turn OFF the news that has this and other horrible events on a loop.
3. Be conscious and selective about the media you watch and expose your children to, especially related to the content of video games, such as the popular Call of Duty.
